The pros and cons of raising your kids with the help of a nanny

June 23, 2019 Posted by: Fleur Beach Parenting

Thinking of getting a nanny in Dubai? We are spoilt for childcare choices in Dubai. In fact one startling statistic from the Knowledge and Human Development Authority (KHDA) claims that 94 per cent of kids in the Emirate are being raised with the help of a nanny or third party.

We (rightly) spend a lot of time scrutinising the nannies that we hire to establish whether they are qualified to care for our children. Do they have first aid training? How many years of experience do they have? Can they cook healthy kids meals, etc? But one thing we should also be considering is our qualifications for managing a nanny.

Successful management can be the key to ensuring that your parenting ethos and family values are carried through when you are not around. The importance of this consistency cannot be overstated. Without it, data has shown that children can become despondent, unfocussed at school and can act out against other children. These issues can carry through to more serious problems such as addiction in adulthood.

Here are a few things to keep in mind to help things run smoothly for your kids and your household as a whole:

You cannot clone yourself – It is important to remember that there is only one you. You cannot clone yourself. Your nanny is a different person and will bring her own experiences and personality to the job. Take some time to discover what these are and guide these into positive channels.

Set clear boundaries – Boundaries are beautiful! Discuss with your partner what your boundaries are and sit down as a family and explain these to your nanny. These can include discipline guidelines, such as all meals should be eaten at the table, as well as nurturing expectations such as, taking the time to listen to and answer questions from the kids and making them feel heard and not ignored. Empower your nanny with this knowledge and make sure she knows that you expect her to enforce these when you are not at home. Check in with her on the regular and with the kids to gauge how this is going.

You can outsource childcare but you cannot outsource love – It is difficult to balance careers and family responsibilities when there are bills to pay and goals to achieve. Working parents often suffer what has been dubbed ‘executive guilt’. You feel you should be with your kids when you are working and you feeling you should be working harder when you are spending time with your kids. It’s a head-spinner, and we don’t propose to have a magic fix for this. However, a good place to start is by fencing off times every week to be with your kids, put it in the diary and don’t miss these appointments. These can be story-time dates and weekend activity commitments.  As well as showing up for these dates, remember to be ‘present’ too. Children are intuitive and they can tell when they are being fobbed. You can’t just sit in the driver’s seat, you have to turn the engine on if you want to go anywhere. Hop over to Kidzapp and discover some fun activities to enjoy with your kids this weekend, and go all in.   

 

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